Mara has nothing to say to me

Finally I was invited to see Mara. After enduring coffee and cake, where the conversation eventually turned to the horse. During this time, the little girl said to me, "Don't worry, I'll tell you all about Mara soon!"

How long do we have to make small talk before they tell me about the troubles they had with the horse? Way too long. See, I'd been emailing them ever since she left here (Sept 2) and they had ignored each email. I asked J to call them and they said only bad things, that they aren't sure they're going to keep her, because she failed a flex test, was lame, and bucking under saddle. My husband and I have been stressing about this the entire month.

I couldn't stand it any longer after two slices of quark-cake and said, "Tell me about the lameness."

"Oh, she was only lame directly after the flex test, she was fine a few hours later." WTH.

The bucking? "Well, she reared a little and bucked, so someone suggested we ride her in Ausbinder and she's much better now, she keeps her head down."

I groaned inside. They're tying her head to her saddle? That can only make her anxiety issues worse.

We went to their barn in Wuppertal together, and I saw Mara hanging out in the paddock/riding ring closest to the barn, even though she could go out to pasture (20 or so acres) with the rest of the herd. Sure enough she was waiting for her BFF, a Haflinger named Max, who was being saddled up.



The father gave Mara some snacks, and pet her over the fence, and the little girl came running with a halter and very fumblingly haltered her. The girl is small and they do the "flip over the ears" thing, which took her a few tries. (In contrast I unbuckle my halter when I go get a horse. Germans always undo the snap and put it on like a bridle. Even on my donkey- which is really hard with those ears.)


It looks like they cut her mane at the withers - later they braided a bit next to it because they didn't want mane to get under the saddle.


Cows - Mara lives by cows. Good. In this photo you can see the cut piece of her mane sticking up.


She led her out and the father took the lead, and he became the hitching post for the day, because the tie rail was occupied. Or was there another reason they don't tie her? I'm always suspicious when someone doesn't tie a horse.

Mara was glowing with health, and smelled so good. She is getting her Winter coat in, and her new coats always come in dark. She was a shining, glorious thing, the prettiest horse on the property, and maybe all of Wuppertal.

I walked up to touch her and she put her nose on my hand, and then looked away quickly. I was just another stranger to her.  Well, good. You belong here, away from me.



Typical Mara. Unable to just relax and be groomed. It was nice to see healthy hooves again without blemishes. They haven't done any trimming yet, I could see. I said soon the Easyboots won't fit. I wonder what happened to her tail? She had a lot more of it when I last saw her.


The family doted on her, so cute. We were there 2.5 hours and they must have spent half the time cuddling with her.


Looking more relaxed, but unwilling to drop her head.



With all three of them brushing her, the little girl kept pausing to hug her and kiss her nose.
The mother warned her, "Be careful with her back hooves!" and I was dismayed - what the heck is wrong that they should be careful with her back hooves? She was resistant when I bought her, but over time she was perfect about her hooves. I see that she has reverted to that old behavior, yanking her back legs away from people. Hm. I couldn't resist - I stepped up and grabbed a back leg and said, "Gimme your foot Mara" and held it the entire time for the girl. I was tempted to do it repeatedly to show them she can, but I let it go.


She showed me her grooming kit and I was glad to see they have a collection of very soft brushes and flexible rubber curries. Hard brushes are not Mara's thing.


Treeless saddle, Mara still giraffing at things. Braid in her mane cuz you wouldn't want hair under the saddle. (!!?)


Then they put the Ausbinder on and I got very quiet and stepped away. People were leading horses around the place and Mara was trying to keep them all in view. She was swinging her hips side to side, trying to gawk at them, but her head was confined, so she became frustrated on top of agitated. They both had to hold her for the girl to get on, and the little girl said, "Mom don't let go!" because the horse would not hold still.



As she scooted around, they said to her, "Quiet down little mouse, you are such a dear!"

Then some horse went by and Mara started to escalate. She started to rear up a little, and I could see that it was in reaction to being confined.  Thee little girl got worried and asked her mother to take ahold of the reins.

She helped, but then went away again. Another horse came by and Mara swung around, dancing. I was the only one nearby so I grabbed her rein and steadied her.

The mother came and led Mara to the ring and the girl asked her mother to please stay nearby. The girl was not scared, the girl only sensed that she had little control over the horse. The mother stayed near, but I put my camera away and expected the worst.

They went around the ring a few times .....and then got a much needed break from the stress.

Her BFF Max joined them in the ring, with a very grouchy looking teenager on his back.



Mara settled right down with her friend in the ring with her. He had pinned his ears at the teenager as she was grooming him, and did even worse in the ring. He was an unhappy fellow, but since he's a Haflinger, he put up with it with his own version of compliance. Occasional bucking, she whipped him repeatedly in punishment. You can see in the video below how she hit Max and he bucked. You can also see Mara try to take the canter but the girl doesn't let her. Not too bad a rider for only 11 years old, even if she's on the wrong diagonal at times.



The teenager's mother watching Max said, "Put your stirrups down a hole, you look like Scheisse up there." I burst out laughing and the teenager said, "Mother can you please ask me in a polite way?" The mother said, "NO, you won't listen. Put your stirrups down TWO holes, you're in a dressage show next week and you need to get your leg down." I said to the father, "It's not even a dressage saddle!"

There are 15 boarders at that barn, and since it was a sunny Sunday afternoon, lots of them were there. I am not used to busy barns anymore, and it was annoying to me to have so many people around, watching what we did, and communally criticizing the Haflinger girl. It was almost chaotic, although I'm sure it's nice if you want to have other riders around to ask for advice. I'm so done with that environment!

The teenager spurred that Haflinger around, and he relented at times into an angry canter, Mara felt inspired to join him, which worried her little girl, and she brought Mara over to us and stopped. "She wanted to canter!"  I saw that too, she was feeling extremely forward, her trot was extended, she looked awesome. And restrained.

As soon as the girl got Mara stopped, I groaned again inwardly to see her rooting again. Mara was a confirmed rooter when I bought her, presumably from being ridden by children in the school. I've always had the opinion, anyway, that horses who root do so because they're ridden by too many kids who yank on them, so the horse learns to yank back, to the fullest possible extreme, pulling the poor kid onto its neck.

But you can see that the Ausbinder were not fastened too tightly, so I assume that Mara has simply reverted to an old habit because she can. The girl isn't strong enough in her upper body to refuse to allow rooting. I should clarify that the girl was not rough with her hands, she kept a light contact the entire time.

I turned to the mother immediately and said, "That is a vice, but I had fixed that - with simply refusing to allow it when she tries. Your child isn't strong enough to prevent it."

The little girl heard us talking and when Mara rooted, she pulled back, but too late. It doesn't help to tug back once the horse has its nose on the ground. In my limited experience, punishment doesn't cure it, but preventing it does.

Mara was chomping her bit in frustration, as she always did with me under stress. The owner said, "Oh look, she's happily chewing her bit." I sighed because this is not relaxation chewing, this is stereotypic behavior, she's trying to destress herself.

Then I noticed that Mara would start backing up each time the girl asked her to stop, and the girl was saying, "Go forward please!" each time, and looking behind her, wondering why Mara was backing up. I said, "That is 100% a result of the Ausbinder. I know this because I tried side-reins on her while lunging a few times, and she would back up when she felt the confinement. She doesn't know what to do with them."

"I hope you don't ride in them all the time?" I asked the mother.

She said, "Only sometimes."

Well, it can be very tempting to ride a horse in a device that makes it look like it has learned connection when it has not. I worked so hard on teaching Mara the proper response to contact, and she was slowly getting it.

It's not the worst thing that can befall a horse, but it will halt all progress, and it will not help her riders learn to be good riders.

I'd asked if they'd ridden her on trails and they said not yet, but they'd enjoyed taking her for walks.









After the ride, which went on forever, the girl gave Mara to her parents to dote over. They brought out a big bucket of kitchen scraps mixed with barley and water - there were apples, carrots, bananas, and potato peels*. The girl said, "This is how we say thank you to Mara after a ride!" and "Afterwards we have to use a towel to clean her nose." Cute. (* - after some research, apparently it's common to feed potato peels to horses in Germany, even though English language websites say they're poison.)

Then the girl wanted to show me the barn. She took me to the solarium, where you stand a horse under red lights and ....."What is the purpose?" I asked. "To warm the horse and dry it in Winter." I guess that would be a luxury.

Next month the horses all move to a Winter paddock during the day, and stalls at night. The stalls are low-walled and bright, but I imagine not too airy in Winter.



The stalls are used for storage in Summer. This one is Mara's. It seems to have a sewage pipe in it (barns and homes are often one building in Germany). I like that there are panels covering the rails, and best of all, there is some sort of pillow in the middle of the stall. It's 3 layers of rubber mat, with the top one being so plush you sink an inch when you stand on it. I don't know how healthy it is to stand on a pillow every night, but it must feel good to lie on, and since it's built up, the urine would run off so it would stay dry. I was curious what the board costs at this place, but I don't ask that question.

The girl showed me the chickens, rabbits, geese, and calves that also live there, as well as the Winter paddock. All the while the parents doted on Mara.

Finally I mentioned I wanted to get home, and the girl ran to Mara and threw her arms around her neck, "I don't want to leave her. I don't want to go to my school field trip tomorrow, I want to see Mara. I must say goodbye properly." She hugged and hugged and kissed and kissed and then led her to the pasture, where she hugged her some more, and then unhaltered her, and stood with her petting her. Eventually Mara wandered off to the other horses and started grazing.

They really love this horse. That is the most important thing.

It saddens me to see a horse take advantage of a situation where expectations are lowered, but I suppose any horse will do this. I trust that someday they'll ask a professional to ride her, and the person will say, "Oh my, did you know your horse has had training?" Mara knows more than her new owners, but she's not gonna give that away.

Love is the important thing, and she's finally got it.