The first thing I said was "They will step on you if you're not careful." And I asked the mother, "Do they have experience with horses?" "Well, yes, they ride all the time!" but, could that be true, at 3 and 5?
The 3 year old girl started whining (more like screaming) as soon as the saddle went on the horse, begging to ride. I said the horse is not a child's horse and hasn't been ridden much lately. The lady said she would take full responsibility and since Mara is insured, I let the lady put the child on Mara in the paddock which is 12X12 feet so Mara just stood there. Then the kid started whining that she wanted the horse to move. The lady led Mara in tiny circles, pivots really. Then the lady wanted to go out on a little trail ride and the girl started having a full-on temper tantrum when asked to dismount.
Mara was half asleep the whole time; she let the kids climb all around her and hug her face and she held perfectly still and enjoyed it.
We went on our little outing and the mother got on Mara and had a nice little ride. The kids were whining and talking to her nonstop, asking if they could ride the donkey, lead the donkey, lead the horse, ride the horse, over and over. The lady was helpless against them. If I tried to say something, the kids would just talk over me so the lady didn't have much of a chance to talk to me.
It was too much for the kids and the lady asked if we could cut it short. The girl started begging her to let her ride, and the mother put her up on Mara. In the woods (!!!) I asked that they put the helmet on the girl, and was told she can W/T/C alone. Mara was trying to scrape the horse flies off with her hind legs and I thought if she were to fullbody shake, the kid would go flying. The little boy kept walking in front of the horse and donkey *backwards* in his crocs, and he kept losing them. The mother kept asking him to not walk backwards in front of the animals - he was only a meter or so in front of them.
The mother would repeat to the kids, "Don't stand so close to the back end of the animals" but I assured her they would not kick, they would only step on them accidentally.
When we got home the kids wanted to give them treats so I quickly separated the two animals again. Then the boy was holding out a long fern he'd picked and Mara was reaching out to get it, leaning toward the little girl who stood between them. I knew it was going to happen THEN. I said it as it happened, "She's gonna step on you" too late, the kid's foot got crushed.
She screamed and cried and I untacked. I had the strangest feeling of schadenfreude, after making sure the foot wasn't broken. She wouldn't stop crying and felt that the horse had hurt her on purpose. She didn't want to be near my horse anymore. Good.
The little boy was running around my horse (in the 12X12 paddock) with his ferns and the mother kept telling him to put the ferns away. I looked at his feet with his crocs on and thought, "Well, if he gets stepped on too, that will be two lessons in one day!"
I untacked Mara listening to the crying and then offered the child some ice cubes for her foot, which she didn't want. The mother was trying to lure Mara back to the girl to get her to "make up" so the girl wouldn't have hard feelings.
I finally said to the teary-faced girl - "I warned you, and the horse did not do it on purpose. I'm afraid it will not be the last time you'll be stepped on, it's only the first time." (I cannot type this without connecting it with a scene from a movie, "I'm a people person dammit, I have people skills!")
Getting stepped on is just part of being around horses. I was a kid when I was stepped on the first time (twice in one day, what an idiot). You develop a sense for horse movement and where to place your feet over time until it's automatic not to get stepped on - most of the time: )
The lady said, "I'm so impressed that your horse is so good with children."
Not only was it an example of crappy parenting, the lady didn't ask any good questions about my horse, nor did she ask me to show her what Mara knows. She said she's been riding all her life, but I think that cannot be true, unless she's daft, to put a 3 year old on a horse you just met.
What I learned: No more small children around my horse. It was a messed up situation that could have turned out worse, but I can forgive myself because I've never done this before. Now I know.
The lady never called back. Whew.
.JPG)
9 comments:
Holy cow! I kind of wondered if the reason why the kids ride "all the time" is because they whine and beg until Mom takes them for free rides on horses that are for sale. And not to wear a helmet because a rider can walk, trot and canter? How presumptuous! There are so many ways to come off a horse and not all of them have to do with one's ability to ride. I would have been a nervous wreck about the whole situation. I've been considering putting Gabbrielle up for sale because I'm overwhelmed with taking care of so many geriatric animals with illnesses and diseases and injuries, especially in 115 degree heat all summer, and no one is going to buy my senior horses and dogs, so I have to find homes for the younger ones. But I can't pull the trigger, because I can't deal with people.
oh, my. To Mara's credit (and your training), she sounds very tolerant and a very good girl around those kids. (Except for stepping on toes, which is human error, not horse.) What a terrible idea to try out a horse, not listed as a family horse, with children scrambling about! That doesn't help anyone assess the horse correctly. I think many horses you would never expect somehow tolerate children quite well (better than me!). I hope the next potential owner has more common sense.
"I quickly separated the animals again" < - I laughed with that sentence because it seemed like a more appropriate description for the kids than for Mara and Bellis! Good girls, both of them. The children sound horrendous. That all could have gone so much worse. I'm glad that woman didn't call you back!
I'm so sorry. Selling a horse seems to attract a lot of crazies - I had some similar inquiries re: Ginger and I felt like they just weren't hearing my (honest) responses to their questions.
Sending you the best of luck in finding a great home for Mara!
In my working life, I often run into parents who are completely disconnected with the reality of their children (and gravity). Whenever possible, I deal directly with the kids, cutting out the parental translation machine. And if the kids are rude, I walk away. Yes, I do. Even when the parent is busy translating/apologizing/whatevering. My life is too short, and I'm a professional, not a doormat!
Obviously, the Dragon seems like she would be a giant liability around kids, but she likes them, especially if I tell her in advance that there will be children and she will like them. She is very gentle and careful and watchful when small children are around, bless her.
OTOH, the Dragon does not like adults whom I don't like <<--we have never disagreed about whether or not an adult is worthwhile. I'm not sure if I take my cues from her or she gets them from me. We don't discuss people we don't like--we just leave when they are around!
Age 3 and 5 cannot equal "they are experienced riders." The younger one has only been doing the gravity thing for 36 months! And I thought the clueless helicopter parents were just an American thing. Bahhhhh.
Ugh, what a stressful visit. Sounds like Mara was really good and tolerant around the kids which was great for the both of you. I would love to know what Bellis would have done had one of the kids been plopped on her back! :)
Nice job with the braids - she is such a pretty girl. Have a fun week!
I pondered the horse-shopping with kids thing and came up with what I consider a good argument to use against parents who think that an insured horse is a safe horse. "I'm sorry but my insurance only gives you money, and does not bring the child back to life."
NM, to be honest, I was a nervous wreck the entire time. I was also in a state of shocked silence because I'd never observed such danger parenting.
Irish, isn't it remarkable, the way even "blooded" horses will behave gently around kids? (Blooded is what they call hot blooded horses in Germany.)
Saiph, wish I could have been assertive enough to do or say something.
T, I have more to come on this topic!
Aarene, you shoulda been here: ) I had no idea that at 3, you cannot master W/T/C - I'm ignorant when it comes to kids as you know. Well now I know: )
Kay, I wonder what Bellis would have done too! I'm braiding and washing Mara's white feet a lot lately because she should be show-ready if someone is shopping.
Oh, dear. I don't need to add anything to this. I always vetted perspective buyers before I'd let them come out. "No, this is not a beginner's horse." "I don't think this horse is suitable for you." No matter how many times you mention in the ad the horse is not for beginners, people don't see it. Yes, I think we all experienced a little schadenfreude with you.
What the heck?? I'm shocked that a parent could be so clueless!!! I'm terrified of my horse hurting kids so I won't even let them in the pasture with my horses. Chrome is just not aware enough of where he's putting his body to be safe around kids! Also little kids' hands fit too easily in his mouth too so I'm leery of even letting them pet him! I'm glad they were okay... Well mostly.. You know what I mean. Ugh! I hope you can find a good owner without having to go through something like that again. I love the braids!!
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