Perhaps I should have paid attention to my internal warning lights when she said, "Oh, I won't be RIDING your horse, ever, I don't ride young horses for clients."
Or the time Mag reared up on his hind legs and she just stood there frozen, doing nothing. And after that, her extreme caution around Mag, asking me to take things off his saddle that might disturb him (his bit), doing ground work even though on day one she said she doesn't do ground work with horses.
The trainer I had before her, Lukas, as you recall, let me down big time when Mag started resisting and he jumped off the horse and ended the lesson. You saw that video. (Oh, I see now it was the first and last time Lukas rode Mag.)
Are both of these people afraid of Mag? I remember KT being afraid of Mara, and often having reasons she couldn't ride client horses (and then when she did ride Mara I had to show her the photos of how chin-to-chest she made the horse go around the entire time, "I ride like that?" She had no idea?).
And the best trainer of all, fearless Mell, fair and good with horses, was not reliable and would lie, "I could not find your house" and would just forget to show up at all.
I replied to Katharina's mail, "Is it me, or is it the horse?" because I don't believe her "too busy" excuse when I show up at her requested time slot, because my schedule is always open, and I go to her house, she just walks 20 meters from her front door to the arena and there I am for my lesson - it can't be more convenient for her. Her website says she comes to clients to give lessons as far away as Cologne.
This self-doubt is familiar - is it me? Cuz I'm American and people don't get me? Then I remembered how wary she was around Mag - how can she be inspired to educate a horse she is afraid of? Is she a Haflinger-only person?
I feel like every avenue of potential progress is being cut off and I don't know what to do.
Last time I was invited up to the fancy arena, even though I was invited and confirmed a second time via text, the lady was totally shocked to see me, "I didn't expect you!" Very uncomfortable. I think she's got some sort of tech, or mental, disconnect - SMS and email just doesn't work with her. She wrote me last week, "Where are you, are you alive?" and I sent back, "You never responded to my last mail so I assumed you were too busy."
I've been trying to hook up with my Appaloosa-owning friend all Summer. She's stopped her car/motorcycle twice this year to chat with me, and says how much she wants to hang out, but cannot commit to a date. I just found out she likes the same restaurant we found recently, so I really hope we can all go together - her husband is a gradeschool teacher so J has someone to talk to about school.
My Arabian horse owning friend S, the one who hooked me up with Mag, has been too busy to do anything with me this Summer except for one time when I walked 5 hours to get to her place and then take a walk to a popular trail where she said she wasn't comfortable so we went home, I'm sure you recall that tale. It was a good day, but sadly the only time she's given us since Mag came here. She just got back from Spain and wrote me, "Let's walk our horses together (I'll ride) again." I just got a text from her as I type this, "Can't do it, maybe next Sunday." *sigh* Since she's my closest horse friend here, and gets me, it's sad that we only hooked up once this year. However, she's a full hour away walking, and I'm not super motivated to get to her place because it's all city streets between us.
Lukas said, "I need you to send this horse away for professional training, or board him somewhere, or ride him in an arena until he's more educated, and then I'll come back and help you."
I believed him that I need professional help - he's the one who gave me Katharina's info. J asked me why I don't just train the horse myself. When "professionals" tell me they're not up to the task, I doubt my ability.
Also I was enjoying starting over with Mag in a safe environment where we could get to know each other where he's most relaxed. So he learns to associate my weight on his back with confidence-building, calm exercises, and then build up slowly from there. A mental/physical foundation for both of us. With a horse knowledgeable person looking on.
It doesn't have to be an expert, just a little knowledge would help.
.JPG)
16 comments:
Oh man- that totally sucks. I would never have thought that it would be so difficult to find a horse trainer in GERMANY of all places. Is it remotely feasible for you to buy a truck and trailer so you can take Mags further away for help? This is crazy - I would love to have you come here with him.
Ah that's it! Move to CANADA. :)
Tell ya what, send Dory a plane ticket and have her come live with you for a month.
Betcha she'd get you moving forward!
Oh, my dear, I think you have been away from American horse culture for so long, that the odd approach that Germans have has become the norm. It's not you. I get being cautious about Arabians. I didn't like them before Khanalee, and I was ashamed for a while to tell anyone I had an Arabian (well, 3/4 Arabian) for a while because of the way they are perceived. Truthfully, I don't think a lot of those trainers know wtf they are doing. It's not you. What helped me more than anything was getting with a gal who had Arabians (actually, her horse was sired by Khemo whereas Khanalee had him for a grand sire.) She was blunt and honest with me about how to deal with him, and it helped me immensely. She didn't let me take shit off of him, not be afraid to use my spurs or whip. I did't know as much then as I do now, but I took leaps forward with her help. The trainer has to understand Arabians. I'm not sure those Germans understand horses much at all. IT'S NOT YOU!
Teresa, with my husband flat refusing to live in America if something bad happens next month....ah well, what are the chances Canada lets a German and an American immigrate? Not very good probably. We both love BC. Oh, and people here don't pull horse trailers with trucks, you know that: ) If I could find a job we could make some changes though. I printed out my diploma and CNA certificate again yesterday, in the hope.
Aarene, it's a nice idea, if she weren't a yeller: (
KB, You're right about Arabians being so rare here that perhaps trainers here don't know what to do with them. So rare I couldn't afford a trained one. Who was Khanalee's sire?
Gah! Don't let it get to you! Hey, you KNOW that Germans can be complete control freaks and like everything to behave just so regardless of reality, and that extends to their horses. So Arabian horses, which don't act, look or feel like their predictable staid warm bloods, fall waaaaaaay outside their comfort zone. Complicating that is the German notion of expertise, in which once you a have a piece of paper proclaiming you knowedgeable about something, you are therefore absolved of all future learning, and if you stumble on a gap in your learning, pure internal panic ensues. So they run away and make a million excuses to avoid admitting their shortfalls. And your trainers? Not so good in the first place. Kind of bullshit artists, really. Unfortunately the trainer pool seems pretty thin there where you are. I'm not a big one for fate but I am a big fan of acknowledging when a new approach is called for because the old one isn't getting anywhere, and so maybe... maybe Mag is the Horse You Trained Yourself. You know? It's scary, but you actually can do this. You're a lifelong horse person with a lot of resources on the internet. Start reading all your old books again, pick out a bunch of new ones, read them in German and English, make a list of things you feel you don't know and then research them properly as if it's for a school paper. And then train him.
Sirje, I was looking at Katharina's website, and it has a list of her Abzeichen to trainer level B, whatever that means. Read German - I'm still working my way through Jim Knopf. Silly dragons. I also read Cavallo but it's mostly "What to do in an arena with your horse" and even the articles about trail riding, "First, start in an arena/roundpen, then find a friend with an experienced horse to accompany you." Actually, do any horse training books say otherwise? I know I could train him without a trainer, if I had a level, enclosed area with safe footing to begin.
How bad the training is in Germany - it's fun to read the lesson barn reviews in Cavallo and see how many, how every month there is a stable whose trainer is abysmal, and the story always goes, "The trainer said nothing to me my entire lesson", or "she said only a few words, and then ignored me." I've had that happen, in a stable close to Cologne, the trainer just watched me ride, or talked to others, or looked at her phone, and never said a word. At that I said "I cannot come back here ever again, I'm not learning anything." I'm sure she thought I was a horrible, unteachable student! I've also done the Abteilung thing where the trainer only shouted out what gait and where to canter but never offered riding tips. That was the barn where all the horses wore Schlaufzuegel, otherwise we'd damage their backs and they'd have to be made into Wurst, the barn owner told me.
A neighbor came by yesterday and said that Katharina's mother had to have her Haflinger turned to wurst - there's a word for it - "verwurstet"? It's fine to destroy a horse if you must, but to talk about making bratwurst is always surprising to me.
I had a great time with Mag today, he followed me around as I golf putted walnuts out of the paddock so the donkey doesn't get sick. He never left my side and would take the rake in his mouth if I let him. The cat was at the fenceline, my Torwart, leaping into the air to catch the walnuts.
Maybe your vet knows a good trainer. You need someone that rides a horse for there work and would ride the snot out of him and settle him down. He seems to need someone that would just ride his bucks out and let him know who is the boss. Just my thoughts and probably all wrong I see men here just stick with the horse until he settles and then praise him for being a good boy.
Ellie, I agree somewhat - if I were home I'd take him to one of our mountains where the steepness and technicality limit the possible speed to a walk. Then again....one of the few things Buck Brannaman said that I disagree with is this, "I don't mess around like you idiots, I just take a misbehaving green horse into the hills and ride him 50 miles and by God he's good by the end of it!"
That sounds like someone who doesn't have to worry if the horse will last as a riding horse, because 50 miles on an untrained green horse will break them in some way, if not physically, then mentally, when you show up with the saddle again, he's going to say, "Ouch, that hurt for three days last time I saw a saddle" where riding equals several days of pain. That B Brannaman said that is irresponsible, IMO.
But maybe my vet knows a trainer, it can't hurt to ask, since he's here so often!: ) I know you didn't mean to imply 50 miles of riding the bucks out, but it reminded me of it so I had to bring it up. Also I ask myself if there are such "cowboy" trainers in Germany.
My feeling is that getting a good foundation on a horse makes for a better trail ride. Maguire, that brilliant Arabian I had, was 4 when I got him, had actually done one 25 race with a kid on his back and the trainer beside, but he was still horribly green when I got him. No half halt. As soon as he left the walk, he'd spark up. So I spent a few months establishing a half halt, a one rein stop, transitions within the gait, etc. When I first took him off the property, he was high headed and a bunch of people were watching, wondering if I were going to get on. I was wondering, but I waited for him to settle some before I got on, then, off we went,and he was ok. Looky and all, but I had some buttons to push, especially that one rein stop. I think the long rides help, but if you could learn the basics of a language before going to live in a different country, wouldn't you? Mag doesn't understand your language, so he is more secure following his own. One thing I learned about Arabians is that they can be very stubborn, and you have to persevere.
Yes, a man like Brannaman can throw a heavy saddle on a green horse and muscle his way through it, but I'm not convinced that is best to start out with. I don't believe in being esoteric about training horses either.I'm a hardened realist when it comes to that. Oh, here is a link to Khanalee's sire's linage:
http://www.allbreedpedigree.com/khlagetoh
I think he's got quite of get out there. He didn't look like Khemosabi in coloring as he was a dark bay, but Khanalee did look like Khemo. I think I dream about Khanalee at least once a week.
I hate to see you this discouraged and I really feel like this horse is a good fit for you. You've lost some confidence and your trainers are just compounding that. Training him yourself isn't the easiest way but you KNOW that you have the knowledge and the experience to do this.
Could you set up a temporary round pen in your field, maybe just with electric fence? Just enough to make him feel contained and controlled? Then you could move it around as that area gets trashed.
Do some round pen work. Walk back and forth on your limited local trail until he's settled then get on and ride the same back and forth. I have a lot of faith in you
I would never mean to ride a horse and ruin him or scare him into what you want, you could never trust him again. I just feel bad that you cannot enjoy just a nice ride on a safe horse. I guess there is a possibility he does not under stand what you want, keep up the good work. He will come around.
Barb, I'm glad you have faith in me: ) Logically I know I can do it but...
For each horse I've had here I've tried to build a roundpen/lunging area - in four different spots in our field. However the only thing I could do was lunge at a walk only. As soon as we trotted, the ground became so rutted that it became impossible. Even in the driest part of the year - Mag fell down twice when he misbehaved. Today we were chasing him around to take photos and he almost crashed again. There is no place that is level here. Two of the places I've tried this are permanently messed up and I have trouble walking there today. You mention moving it when it gets roughed up, but those 4 spots are the only spots that are not crazy steep. So many people have told me to section off part of our field, and I can't seem to make it work. Cuz it would be so great if it did work - a place right here to make progress.
Elie, I didn't mean to imply that you would want me to overwork him, but it just reminded me of what Brannaman said: )
Building on the round pen/small arena idea...instead of investing in a trailer, is it possible to hire/rent a small earth mover (Bobcat with blade, tractor with bucket, small front end loader) and MAKE a level spot? My arena had a definite downhill at one end, so I built a little retaining wall and filled it in. If you pick a spot that won't limit your haying activities, pull dirt from the high side to fill in the low die, then bring in lots of sand to solve the "slipperies". Twenty meters minimum, maybe thirty, round or oblong. What d'ya think?
Evensong, I think that would be the most practical thing we can do, even not understanding your words like "bobcat" - I think I know what you mean, but it would also require a layer of footing, and if I'm correct, doesn't every roundpen/arena, need to be occasionally flattened, smoothed? We have no tractor, becauase we don't know how it would be useful on such a sloping property. I appreciate your advice.
Try looking for trainer that starts, re starts, and works with green horses. Find some one whose reguarly starts horses for a living. I realize this sort of trainer may be harder to find in Germany..but surely they exist. Don't worry about style of riding discipline. A good colt starter (by this I mean some one who starts the horse from halter breaking up through being ridden under sadle) will be able to get the basics done. Like all trainers you will have to find one that is honest and doesn't take short cuts. Find some one who learns from each horse they start, as opposed to finding one who starts all horses the same, never changing their methods to suite the horse.
Are there are any young horse starting competitions, similar to mustang makeovers here in the US? That would be a good place to start. Your vet might be another source of advice. Local breeding operations have a colt starter resource. Your trimmer might also be a good resource...since people who are into barefoot often approach colt starting witha gentler hand and open mind -just my experience.
There are a lot of half baked 'trainers' out there. A big red flag if the trainer is not willing to get on your horse, especially since Mag is not dangerous and has not shown any unreasonable behavior. Ditch any trainer who isn't willing to get upon your horse. Every good trainer I have worked with regularily gets on my horse if only to demonstrate how something is done...and also to get a feel of what is really going on (how much is the horse, how much is my riding).
I recently re started my mom's Arabian mare after 11 years of no riding (and only 3 years of basic riding prio to that long lay off). My trainer got on for the first ride after I did the ground work for a few weeks. He rode for a bit and then put me aboard. We spslit the dreaded 'first ride after an 11 year lay off'. Easy peasy. I have weekly lessons...and my trainer hops on aboard regularily to demonstrate techniques. My trainer encourages and expects forward progress. He would not be fazed by a rear, buck, or spook if it occured...his reaction would be to find the source (resistance, pain ect.) He would probably have it figured out any such behavior occured. A rear under the lunge is typical young horse, resistant horse, confused horse, excited horse and so forth behavior. So is bucking. Some horses always give a few exuberant bucks under the lunge..others grow out of it. Big deal.
Good luck, I think you have excellent horsemanship instincts. Your obstacles are lack of a good trainer and facilities. Trust your gut. Remember you rode Basha places I would never dream of going...you have guts, patience, and knowledge. Please don't let a series of flakey trainers discourage you...or convince you that your instincts to start riding Mag regularily, are worng. You are correct: he needs regular riding under the guidence of a trainer who has a much bigger tool box of skills, then any of the trainers you have worked with since arriving in Germany. You simply need an honest trainer who used to starting and working with untrained and green horses. May you find that trainer soon.
That sucks! I wish she would at least be honest about why. 😑 I was so hopeful that you'd found a good trainer. I totally get where you're coming from about the doubting yourself and everything. I think Mara shook your confidence. Mag isn't like her though. Even when Chrome was spooking and even bolting he didn't really put me in danger. It was scary but we worked worked through it and I have very little confidence in myself. If I can do it do can you. I do have an advantage though with my fenced yard and flat driveways... I wish you could find a flat, enclosed space. Does anyone have a flat pasture they would let you ride in?
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