Lesson 4 – You get what you pay for

My lessons are cheap and I think I know why. I think my trainer is no good. I think she’s one of countless inept German riding instructors.

Steffi (trainer) was in the corner talking to her friends the first 10 minutes and I just took the time to work on stopping the horse using the wall, which seems to work and last time she praised me for thinking of that trick. So as I was working on it another rider came in and started cantering around on a big warmblood and suddenly Steffi notices what I’m doing and yells at me, “You cannot use the rail if you’re only walking!!” Right, that’s arena etiquette. Except I was having a paid lesson, and I am trying to teach the horse to stop.

I meandered to the middle and thought, “What are my options?” I decided on the one-rein stop. Then Steffi looks over and sees me turning his head to my knee and she yells, “What are you doing to him, twisting him like that? He doesn’t understand what you want!”

Now I’ve been yelled at twice in 5 minutes and I got pissed off. She’s not directing me, so I have to guess at ways to help the horse. Sometimes I guess correctly and last night I guessed wrong.

So I continued riding serpentines, 10 meter figure 8s, walk-stop-back over and over until she finally decided to stop talking to her friends and come into the center of the arena. She told me my reins are too long.

Suddenly, now that she’s standing there, I’m allowed to use the rail/wall again. OK then.

Then I used the wall to stop Danny and he tried to dive out and keep walking but I pulled him back to the wall and WHAM he hit his face on one of the support beams.

Then I got yelled at with actual anger in her voice, “What are you doing to him? He cannot see out of that eye!!!” I stared at her, “What?” and she said, “He’s blind in that eye, don’t you know that?” *shock* I said, “No, I didn’t.”

Now I’m really pissed, so I say nothing, not that she understands me anyway.

Usually I am independent and do what I want and she makes comments. I realized that I was making it really easy for her because she didn’t have to direct me much. So, in my frustration, I quit initiating things.

I gave control of the lesson to the trainer. And it was abysmal. She didn’t say much else other than “Shorten your reins” every few minutes, and “Lengthen your legs.”

She also gets mad when I kick the horse when he stops to poop. I cannot tell you how many times I’ve had people say, “He’s just pooping, let him!” and I answer, “And if he’s in a horse show someday?” which is what I said to her last night. By the 3^rd time he pooped, I actually was able to keep him in motion. And Steffi gave up trying to get me to just let him stop. Perhaps my logic made sense to her?

SHORTEN YOUR REINS! for the 10^th time. My hands were way out in front of me, in front of his withers. If my hands were any further forward, I’d have to bend over. I admit I have a tendency to let my reins out and those rainbow reins really helped with that – or knots in reins, but I was riding with my hands so far forward it was crazy.

I realized as I rode circles around her that she was saying nothing except “No” and “Wrong” to me. She was giving me nothing to succeed at, so the horse and I didn’t have any way to interpret that 45 minutes other than “bad horse” and “bad rider.”

A good trainer would find a solution to the problems and find a way to let us have a success. Accomplishment is what brings riders back to pay for their next lesson. Even if you cannot accomplish any goal, you can end on a good note…somehow!

I should have jumped off the horse and said, “YOU GET ON” when I saw that this was going nowhere. But I was afraid that I would not be able to do it without anger and spite in my voice. (Truthfully, I’m afraid to have my suspicions confirmed, that she can’t ride any better than I do.)

Overwhelmed with frustration at not being given any tools to help the horse with his horrible pulling/bracing, I did nothing.

When she answered her cell phone during my lesson I dropped the reins and my fingers were raw and red.  German school horses all require gloves, isn’t that sad? I’d forgotten mine. And I don’t pull back on this horse, I use the wall when I can. But asking him to reverse, he always leans against my hands and resists moving back. I’ve started to just ask for a half step back. Probably what should happen is someone on the ground help me teach him the back cue over and over, reinforcing on the ground with a whip handle tapping his chest. But where would I find someone on the ground who is able to help me? Hm.

Then Steffi made a phone call because the barn manager had driven off, locking her car keys in the beer lounge.

I realized you get what you pay for in lessons.

She had to leave and I said, “Let me pay you” and she said, “Just pay me next week. Leave the saddle in the aisle outside the stall, I’ll get it tomorrow. I have to run!” and she left and I was the last person in that huge dark barn with an empty stall right in the middle, stripped of bedding, nameplate still on the door…..and I thought I had a bad day. My colleague’s horse was stolen last week.: (

On the way home I cried because I feel that I will fail at helping reform this stiff heavy school horse. I don’t  have confidence that Steffi can help me help him. Tears were from my own pride, feeling my own shortcomings, my ignorance of what it takes to fix the horse, and the total lack of support from the person I pay to help me.

I will give her one more lesson and see if she actually teaches me, or the horse, something.